The Name Game

Why is it that anger births verbal insults? I would like to say that it occurs more frequently among children, but this is not necessarily so. I try to control the tongue lashings between my son and daughter, but unfortunately, they have my blood so where there is heat, there is sure to be fire. This has become a real problem for both of them and it seems as though they just don't get the importance of respect and the new commandment #2, do on to others as you would like them to do on to you. It seems so simple, if you don't like being called anything other than the name your mama and daddy gave you then you shouldn't call anyone else out of their name.

Even at the ages of eight and six it's hard for me to conceive why this is such a war with them. Now we've all been called out of our name and we all lived to tell, but in this day and age we have cases of kids being bullied until they just can't take it anymore and the take their own lives. I don't want to be that mother that comes in and finds my child hanging from the closet door. This is why I feel so strongly about the language that my children use.

Now granted, Thing One- Aidan, is a highly functioning Autistic child. He has Aspberger's Syndrome which impairs his social skills and I expect it more from him, though I don't let him know that. Winter-Thing Two is just a chip off the old block and is not taking crap from her brother, so she can dish it out in heaps. Winter takes punches at Aidan's weight, while going for his gut, literally. Thing One on the other hand makes up random whimsical non-sense names that one must hold their breath so as not to laugh out loud upon hearing initially. (Tiny little pip-squeak turd bomber.)

As a mom, I try to impress upon them that while I prefer you to use your words instead of your hands, hurtful words can strike just as hard. They understand the concept but there is still a lack of self control I'm working on. What I wonder is if most parents are giving the same speeches behind closed doors or are they calling their own children tiny little pip-squeak turd bombers? I don't like to disparage my children nor do I want them disparaging anyone else, especially each other. What are your thoughts? Do you think this is something children grow out of or should I remain aggressive in my approach to disband the use of slurs?